August 22, 2017

Can Vampires Have Sex?

Stupid question, right? Believe it or not, this is one we get often. Can vampires have sex?

In fact, this same question was recently asked of someone considered an authority on Sci-Fi (whose name I cannot recall) and he was annoyed at the notion. In his view, vampires can’t have sex and the idea is preposterous.

To me, it’s preposterous to pose this question to someone whose area of expertise is Sci-Fi when vampires in all their forms fall solidly within the realm of the paranormal. Seems a bit like asking someone with colorblindness to describe the beauty of a sunset…

Because this is a question that comes up a LOT (thanks, Twilight, for giving us vampires who are already hard as stone, thus making people wonder how one could get any, erm, harder), we’ll address the answer to this question as it applies to two different classes of vampire.

Real Vampires

Simply put, yes, real vampires can have sex. Why? Because they’re people, just like anyone else on the planet with the same biological impulses and desires. The only difference between someone with modern vampirism and someone who isn’t a vampire is the necessity of feeding off pranic energy via another’s blood or another’s aura.

Not really a lot to say on this point. It’s sort of like asking if brunettes or vegetarians can have sex. Let’s move on.

Fictional Vampires

Discussing the sexual capabilities of a fictional vampire is where the discussion turns tricky. Some of the earliest vampire legends featured vampires as ugly and decaying undead beings who sought only blood, never sex. In essence, when your skin’s rotting off, you probably won’t be able to find any takers between the sheets. Even if you could, your body is dead, making it dysfunctional from a sexual perspective.

It wasn’t until more recent decades that fictional vampires became beautiful creatures, oozing charm and seductiveness. Think about the vampires from Ann Rice’s Vampire Chronicles or those devilishly sexy vampires on True Blood. (Yes, you can even consider how Bella swoons at each of Edward’s kisses in the Twilight Saga.) Glamouring mortals and raw sex appeal were skills not always part of a vampire’s repertoire.

It’s been expressed numerous times that there are certain biological functions necessary for sexual activity that a fictional vampire can’t have happen. (Think of blood flow…We’re not spelling out the mechanics of sex for you…) From a strictly logical and scientific breakdown of sex, it is 100 percent accurate to state that vampires cannot have sex.

It’s still a wrong assumption, but there is some merit to the argument.

Here’s the problem: You can’t apply rational and scientific thinking to elements of the paranormal. When we’re talking about fictional vampires – in modern fiction, at least – we’re talking about reanimated corpses that never decay and actually grow more beautiful than in life as long as they have a steady intake of human blood. We’re talking about creatures with preternatural speed, strength and senses. In some cases – Underworld Evolution -  we’re talking about vampires that grow wings and fly around when they get old enough. Hell, they might even turn into a bat, depending on which vampire book you’re reading.

Why then is it so out of the realm of possibility that these fictional depictions of vampires could get down and dirty with each other or willing human fang-bangers? (Thank you, True Blood, for giving me the most awesome of expressions…) Seriously, we can suspend disbelief when it comes to 99 percent of the insane abilities fiction gives to vampires, yet we balk over sex?

Really?

Because they lost me at wings, not when the vampire decided to get freaky-naughty. (Well, okay, they also lost me in Breaking Dawn when Meyer perverted the definition of the incubus/succubus to justify creating a half-vampire, half-human baby, but I think most can agree the Twilight vampires aren’t exactly on the same page with the rest of the vampire fiction or paranormal fiction out there.)

I know I’ll regret asking this question, but why do you believe vampires can or can’t do the deed? Remember to keep your remarks in semi-clean PG-13/R territory if you want your comment to actually get approved. (We don’t censor a whole hell of a lot, but overtly sexual content or extreme profanity goes bye-bye…)

“Embrace the darkness…”

© 2010, Jen Whitten. All rights reserved. Remember, using content from this site without prior written permission will either land you on Dexter’s table or set off the zombie apocalypse. DON’T SAY I DIDN’T WARN YOU.

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About Jen Whitten

Jen Whitten is a paranormal researcher and writer, specializing in psychic development, Empaths, modern day vampirism and dealing with entities. She regularly discusses the paranormal realm, as well as the dark inner workings of the mind.

Comments

  1. Anna says:

    I think that the allure and sexuality of the vampire definitely came about with the creation of the literary vampire. Before that they were just monsters of the night.

    I read a great book called From Demons to Dracula (I reviewed it on my site here http://www.loveofvampires.com/2010/vampire-book-from-demons-to-dracula/) that describes the evolution of the modern vampire.

    I personally love the modern vampire. Hello sexy!! So, yes, I am one who is all for vampires having sex!

  2. Admin says:

    Yes, if I’m going to watch a vampire movie or television show, I’m with you on that…I’d definitely rather be staring at a sexy vamp. ;)